This past year has been a year of reflection. It has been a year of fighting fear. It has been a year of learning to trust again. I use the word again simply because it seems as though over and over God is having to teach me to trust.
This past year we also added a beautiful little girl to our family. Before you keel over in shock, let me explain why I haven't said anything until now.
I suspect that I have had several more miscarriages over the past couple of years. I have had faintly positive pregnancy tests only to see my doctor and be told that I was not pregnant. I did not anticipate anything different with the test I took last September.
Except it was different. Just as I began to hope that this would be a take home baby, I woke up to discover that I was bleeding heavily. After three agonizing hours in the ER, I was told I had a sub-chorionic hemorrhage. Essentially, the placenta was separating from the wall of my uterus. While baby looked okay, the risk of a late miscarriage overshadowed my growing hope our little one would make it our arms. And so, just days before I was planning to share with the world our exciting news, my world was turned upside down again.
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| Art Show photos |
Thanksgiving and Christmas came and went in a whirlwind. I finished my photography class, with an A of course, and had a couple of my photos displayed in an art show on campus. We enjoyed visiting with lots of family over both holidays.
Then came January... We were told to prepare for another little girl. Michael and I began the challenging task of naming her. Princess N, Lady A, and Miss E, were not easily named and our new little girl was no different. We were also told my OB would be moving in two weeks time. We were understandably upset. After all, I have never had the doctor that provided my prenatal care deliver any of the older three and it turned out this time was no different.
The days passed with little further concern other than increasing contractions. I had essentially the same issue with Miss E so I wasn't overly concerned. We made plans for family to visit and prepared the room for our yet unnamed little girl. The original plan was for Lady A & Miss E to share with their new sister. As plans tend to go, that one changed too.
May finally arrived. With it came the anticipation of finally meeting our little girl. I counted down the weeks. Michael and I went walking whenever possible to try to help gravity encourage labor. At my 37 week appointment, my new doctor told me he expected me to give birth soon. I heard the same thing at my 38 and 39 week appointments. By the time 40 weeks rolled around, Dr F said that he really didn't want me going too much past 40 weeks. The way my clinic calculated the due date, they added two days after the 40 week mark. So, while my due date was May 24th, I was actually 40 weeks on the 22nd.
After my 40 week appointment, Michael and I decided to wait out the weekend. Dr F had said he would be on call at the hospital on that Saturday and Monday. Michael and I wanted to give my body enough time to start labor on its own before we agreed to induce. I was getting very discouraged and I was convinced I would be the first woman in history to be pregnant for the rest of her life.
Saturday came and went. Sunday evening, I began preparing for our trip to the hospital on Monday morning. I packed the girls things so they could go swimming at my aunt's house while they waited to hear their baby sister had been born. My mom had come in on the 21st of May and planned to leave on the 4th of June. I was very glad my mom was here to help take care of them, but selfishly, I had wanted her to have so much more time with our little one too. As I was preparing for Monday, I had a few contractions that didn't seem to be doing much. It seemed as though labor had been starting and stopping for the past couple of weeks so I went to bed.
A little while later, after an especially painful contraction, I told Michael that if I had another contraction like that, I wanted to head to the hospital. About 20 minutes later, we were on our way to the truck. All I could think about was Miss E's birth on the side of the road. I definitely did NOT want a repeat experience. What ordinarily would have been a half hour trip in the evening time took us closer to fifteen minutes at one o'clock in the morning.
Once at the hospital, I was hooked up to the monitors and we began the arduous process of signing all the consent forms and hooking up IVs, etc. Just over an hour later, the doctor stopped in to introduce himself. He was planning to talk with us for a few minutes and then change into his scrubs for the delivery. I had two contractions with him in the room. On the second contraction, I said one word, "Push." The room became a flurry of activity and our little girl was born just a few minutes later. Instead of having time to change, the doctor attended the delivery in his cowboy boots, jeans, and a polo shirt. Only in Texas. :)
Duchess L was born 5 days overdue on May 27, 2013 at 3:05 in the morning after 4 hours and one minute of labor. She was also born about 5 hours before we had planned to head to the hospital to be induced. She is a precious addition to our family.
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| Just born |
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| Miss E loves her baby! |
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| Sleepy girl |
I can not begin to tell you how blessed we are to have Duchess L as a part of our family. But I think even more than the joy she has brought us, I am thankful for the things God has shown me about myself and my family and mostly about His unchanging nature. Even through the midst of my fear and trepidation, God remained ever faithful and ever gracious. He faithfully reminded me that He cares for our every need. Time and time again God provided in tangible ways that just moved me to tears. Having Duchess L is an amazing thing. Having the gift of Christ and a Father whose love is beyond compare is even more amazing.
I am so blessed.
Hopefully more to come in the next few days.
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